Eminem's Return To the Screen Sounds Lame

I was a fan of Eminem's film debut 8 Mile. I thought he showed a lot of intelligence in partnering up with a filmmaker like Curtis Hanson and by taking on a role that was so autobiographical that he didn't have to stretch too much and expose himself as a neophyte actor. That being said, I thought he was pretty good in the film; though there is always the nagging question of whether he was good strictly because he was playing a part that is essentially himself. As more and more time passed since he made that impressive debut without any word on what he might be doing next in terms of film work, I started to wonder if he didn't enjoy the process of filmmaking, or perhaps, he was waiting for another situation like 8 Mile to present itself so he could work with a talented director in a role that spoke to him personally. Well, throw all that out the window.

After seven years, Eminem is returning to the screen with a new project getting the green light last week that sounds... disappointing. He will next star in Shady Talez, a 3D horror anthology film that's been described as "Twilight Zone meets Creepshow." Really? Doesn't this sound like something Snoop Dogg would do? Wait a second, isn't this something that Snoop Dogg already did ? This whole thing really seems cheesy. A deal has already been struck for a four issue comic series about the film that will share the same title. Speaking of the title; it really truly is awful. Shady Talez sounds like the title of a crappy unauthorized biography on Eminem. It nauseates by working Eminem's alter ego in, as well as tagging a word with a "z" instead of an "s" to show us how cool and urban it is.

While the film is being described as a "Twilight Zone meets Creepshow" project, I'd like to point out that Twilight Zone was aided by the direction of people like Steven Spielberg and John Landis and Creepshow boasted of the talents of Stephen King in the scripting department and George A. Romero behind the camera (Not to mention the special make up effects wizardry of the legendary Tom Savini.) Shady Talez is being scripted by a guy who wrote one episode of South of Nowhere and the guy who underwhelmed us with Underworld. The film doesn't have a director attached, but Dallas Jackson, the man who brought us the South of Nowhere episode and who will also double as a producer on the film says he'll be looking at some of the "hot directors from the music video world." He also promises (threatens?) that his script will pay a "hip hop homage to classic horror films." Among the films mentioned to get the "urban wink" (according to /Film) are Christine, Aliens and The Lost Boys. I suspect this movie will be really shitty, but Christine is gonna look so sick lowered and with some sweet rims.